Today’s track: Harsh — Eleni Drake
In lieu of the cancer — and everything that’s come with it — I’m diagnosing a lot of things in my life that just aren’t compatible with the way I need to live now.
What does that mean?
It means I probably shouldn’t be eating sugar. Not really, not at all. It’s a special treat now — a deserve-it thing. Fruit’s fine. But the refined carbs that break right back down into sugar? Those have to go. More fiber in, more of that out. The pork and the processed meats are already gone.
And here’s the part that’s harsh: the stuff I enjoy is no longer compatible with how I should live.
I used to fast most of the day, eat one bigger meal, and end the night with Jeni’s ice cream. If you’ve never had it — grass-fed dairy, higher fat, the good stuff. That’s always been where my brain lives. And now my daily Jeni’s is gone.
I made a joke with some friends that if I just gave up ice cream for two weeks, I’d probably drop right down to my baseline — optimal health, whatever you want to call it. And sure enough, my smart scale is now telling me I’m in the best shape of my life. I’m thirty-eight, and it’s reading my metabolic age at thirty-three.
I think that’s a hoot, honestly.
The drinking wasn’t a hard give-up — I’d already lost the taste for it these last few years. It’s a carcinogen, it makes me sleepy, and it never really brought me much. So no loss there.
The sun, though — that one’s coming. Over these next six months I’m guessing they’ll tell me I can’t be out in it the way I am. I read in my hammock. I work from my hammock. I take my business calls walking laps around the backyard like a Formula 1 driver, headphones on, talking through ideas and building out SOPs and systems. So now it’s more shade, more inside time. Which is fine. Shade is great. But it’s still a thing I’m giving up.
And there’s one more thing on the list that doesn’t show up on a smart scale: stress.
Stress might be the thing we all need to cut most. Take less on your plate. Delegate the things that don’t need to be yours. And spend less time around the people who raise your blood pressure — the ones you’re not entirely sure are aligned with your interests, or sure of their intentions. That’s a subtraction too. Maybe the most important one.
Here’s the thing.
For most of us, the healthy choices are the easy ones to name. Ease off the drinking. Take the diet seriously. Get to the gym. Get the steps up. The obvious stuff. And the reasons are easy to reach for too — do it for your parents, do it for your dog, do it for your neighbor.
But the harshest choices are the ones that come for the things you actually love. The comforts you built your day around. Those don’t make a tidy little list — and nobody hands you an easy reason to give them up.
But it is okay to be bummed about losing the things that made us comfortable. That’s life. That’s growing. And there’s a real kind of addition hiding inside the subtraction — refocus the time you’d spend on too much Netflix into one long-form video on something that actually enhances your life. You don’t just lose. You make room.
There’s the other kind of addition too — adding new good things. Working with the body. I can’t do much right now, but I believe in sprinting. I believe steps are incredible. Last year I averaged 11,233 steps a day. The average American does around 4,000. I’d fallen off, but I hit 8,000 a few days ago, and I’m climbing back. In two or three weeks, if my body’s up to it after surgery, I’ll be walking the dogs again. We’ll see how it feels through chemo.
And the thing that makes all of it stick: friends who are aligned in the same endeavors. The ones who’ve also lost the zeal for drinking. Who picked up birding. Fellow walkers. Fellow sunners. They reinforce the habits — but more than that, they reinforce the way of thinking.
I’ve found my best success comes when I decide to do these things for me. Not for my parents, not for the dog, not for the neighbor. The internal drive is just stronger when it’s personal.
Giving up the good stuff is harsh, for sure.
But the space it leaves isn’t empty for long.
Warmly,
Rob Bergeron
Owner–Realtor at Award-Winning Winner Realty
Schedule a time to discuss your goals, bottlenecks, whatever is on your mind.
The Morning Bergeron daily track playlist: https://music.apple.com/us/playlist/the-morning-bergeron/pl.u-pMyl2GlSW1N3qv
PS: What’s one comfort you’ve quietly outgrown — and what filled the space? Hit reply. I read every one.