Today's track: Ben Kweller — Falling
Lately I've been doing a lot more backyard sits. More walks. More burgers. More phone calls, more pop-bys, more walk-and-talks with friends. It's been good. Really good, actually.
And when you actually get into it with people — when you're sitting outside or walking around the neighborhood and you get past the first ten minutes — something keeps coming up. It's hard to name. But I think the closest word is: surface level.
Like there's a collective feeling that things have gotten a little thin. That the day-to-day has become somewhat routine in a way that doesn't always feel like it's adding up to something. It might be a millennial thing. I genuinely don't know. But it's consistent enough across enough conversations that it feels worth saying out loud.
What I keep noticing is that a lot of people have quietly retreated into reading. And I think that makes a lot of sense. Reading is how you get to live other lives without going anywhere. You sit where you are — with whatever's actually going on — and you get to borrow someone else's perspective for a while. You build empathy. You get out of your own head by living inside somebody else's. And I think we've all collectively landed on this idea that reading is worth our time. That it counts. That it's not wasted.
But underneath the reading, underneath the backyard sits and the walk-and-talks, I think a lot of people are still quietly sitting with the same question.
What's the point?
What am I actually doing?
I thought I'd be further by now.
I thought I'd have this part figured out.
That's not despair — it's more like a low hum. A pressure that doesn't go away, it just gets easier to ignore on better days.
I'm 38. Most of my people are heading into 40, or just past it. And what I keep hearing is that everyone is in the middle of this quiet refinement. What matters. What doesn't. What's worth your time. Who is worth your time. What does a good day actually look like for you, not for someone else's version of your life.
Nobody announces it like that. But it's there, underneath every conversation, if you let it get deep enough.
And it's not just time and attention. People are recalibrating their bodies too. Nearly every dude I know either doesn't drink at all anymore or barely does. A lot of the women too. People are being more intentional about what they're eating. Some have found marijuana. Some have found mushrooms. Some have just found that cutting out the thing that wasn't serving them anymore — whatever that thing was — made more room for the things that do. That's harder than it sounds. Letting go of something you've always done, even when you know it's not working, takes a certain kind of honesty. I respect it.
And every time someone lets on that they're feeling it too — that they don't have it figured out, that they're still in the questions — something happens. It's humanizing in the best way. Not misery-loves-company. More like: oh good. It's not just me. This is just what this part of life actually is. The refinement. The recalibration. The slow, honest work of figuring out what you actually want.
Also — and I need to say this — the nerds are doubling down on their special interests. Hard. Every conversation I've had lately, somebody's going deep on something. A very specific author. An obscure sport. A niche hobby they've had since childhood that they're suddenly taking seriously again. I love this more than I can say. Something about people giving themselves permission to care intensely about a thing — just because they love it, not because it's productive or impressive or on-brand — feels like exactly the right response to all of the above.
So here's where I land, and I want to hear from you on this:
Where are you seeking purpose right now? What are you doing with your precious time? What's the special interest you've gone all-in on lately — or the question you keep coming back to?
Warmly,
Rob Bergeron
Owner–Realtor at Award-Winning Winner Realty
Winner Realty | OffMarket.deals | Property Partner Data Company | HireMySub.com
The Morning Bergeron daily track playlist: https://music.apple.com/us/playlist/the-morning-bergeron/pl.u-pMyl2GlSW1N3qv
PSS: Branch Still Stands!
